June 6

Beatrice Lillie (b. 1894 in Toronto, Canada – d. 1989 in England)

Certain things are expected of gay men. I’m not talking about being able to lip sync along with Cher’s “Believe,” or even knowing where Kylie’s tour stops next. Too easy.

The other day I was talking to friends, including a gay man in his thirties, and somehow the names Noel Coward and Beatrice Lillie came up – to a blank stare. To my astonishment, my otherwise erudite friend had heard of neither. Well, my little chipmunks, accept the sobering news that there were gay icons long before you were born. Yes, it’s true.

So here’s a history lesson, as today I introduce my younger blog followers to Beatrice Lillie, who for three quarters of the twentieth century was an outrageous, over the top gay icon. Easily recognizable by her trademark l-o-n-g cigarette holder, short jet black hair, extravagant string of pearls (which she often swung in circles) and close-fitting hat, comedienne Beatrice Lillie was hailed as "the toast of two continents," enjoying simultaneous careers in North America and England. She was especially loved in Great Britain, where she was the most popular comedian of her era.

Early on, Lillie performed with her sister and mother in Canada as the “Lillie Trio.” She went to London in 1914 and soon became a star performer in revues. In 1927 Lillie debuted on Broadway in a show her friend, Noel Coward, wrote just for her. Cole Porter wrote songs for her. She was a close friend of Charlie Chaplin, Sir Winston Churchill and George Bernard Shaw. Lillie established a film career from the year 1925 in her debut in  “Stars on Stage.” She was a popular performer with the troops during WW II, and following the war years Lillie hosted her own radio show and embarked on several world tours. Late in her career Lillie was a popular guest on television talk shows. I first saw her on TV as a guest on the Merv Griffin Show (I’ll give him his own post as an influential, wealthy closeted gay singer and TV host). I’ll never forget the moment she glided onto the set on roller skates (she was in her early sixties).

No one else did what Bea Lillie did, before or since. Her performances were an arresting weave of parody sketches, monologues, songs and patter that were at once witty, satirical and droll. She poked fun at snobs, yet she herself was a member of Britain’s peerage, becoming Lady Peel upon her marriage to Lord Robert Peel. An oft-told anecdote gives a glimpse into the sharp tongue and wit of Lady Peel (a.k.a “Bea” Lillie):

Lillie was having her hair coiffed at Elizabeth Arden when the fabulously wealthy wife of the founder of the Armour meat-packing company entered, noticed Bea Lillie and chorus girls from Lillie’s stage show, and complained loudly that she didn't realize there would be show girls present, or she would not have come. Soon thereafter, as Lillie was leaving and saying goodbye to the manager in the waiting room, she said, "You may tell that butcher's wife that Lady Peel has finished."

Another quote:
"I played an understudy who was such a lowly member of a theatrical troupe that she had to play the role of ‘Nothing’ in ‘Much Ado About Nothing.'"

Bea introduced her trademark pearl swing during the song (yes, really) "Come, Oh Come to Pittsburgh" in the 1948 Broadway show "Inside USA.”

Lillie, with her androgynous good looks, became a popular male impersonator in wartime theatrical revues. In a tuxedo,  top hat, and a greasepaint mustache, she was billed as "the best-dressed transvestite in London." It was widely rumored that she had lesbian affairs with Tallulah Bankhead and Gertrude Lawrence.

In the mid-1970's, after the completion of her autobiography "Every Other Inch A Lady," Bea suffered a series of strokes. She moved from her New York apartment to her house "Peel Fold" at Henley-on-Thames, England. There, immobilized by failing health, she spent her remaining years with her manager and long-time companion John Huck.

Photo at right:
Laine Littlepage

Monterey, California, based performer Laine Littlepage has had great success in recent years with her one woman show, a tribute to Beatrice Lillie. Littlepage, who bears an uncanny resemblance to the real Lillie, performs many of Lillie’s classic set pieces and acts.

A signature piece of Lillie’s, which I saw Beatrice Lillie herself perform on TV, was “Maud,” written by her sister Muriel and Nicholas Phipps. Here is a link to a recording, along with the lyrics/text.

Just one listen and you’ll be hooked. Enjoy.    

MAUD, (YOU'RE ROTTEN TO THE CORE)
Performed by Beatrice Lillie
Written by Muriel Lillie and Nicholas Phipps

Click on this link:
www.we7.com/song/Beatrice-Lillie+/Maud?m=0

And now, I'm going to tell you about a friend of mine...

I was having lunch with Maud the other day here,
And I told her, "Maud, I'm feeling kind of low.
My life is just too dreary and depressing,
But why it is, I really do not know."

Then as I spoke,
I saw the truth quite clearly;
I saw myself a vulgar, hollow, fraud.
So then, I had another sip of brandy,
And I leaned across the table, and I told her, "Maud....
We're all of us, just rotten to the core."
(God knows why I hadn't thought of it before!)
I said, "Darling, look at you,
And the sordid things you do!
And the sordid sort of people you adore!"

I said, "Maud, you're full of maggots, and you know it.
Your soul's a bed where worms queue up to breed.
You don't know what life's for, Maud,
You're rotten to the core, Maud."
And Maud agreed.

So then I had another sip of brandy,
And Maud gave a sort of deprecating cough.
But I really thought this thing was so important,
I wasn't going to be put off.
I had a manicure I was late for, and a hangover,
As long as it was broad.
But as I say, I felt this thing important,
So I had another sip, and I told her,
(Hmm. Where are?....oh, there you are.)
Maud.... we're all of us just rotten to the core.
You, me, and the Rhani of Bunghpore.
I said, "Look at Mabel. Stuffed with slime.
And getting stuffier all the time.
Look at Popsy, and that queer old man next door.
Alright, look at Freddy and that club that he belongs to.
Also Maggie, with that squalid little Swede.
You don't know what life's for, Maud.
You're rotten to the core, Maud."
And Maud (I'm glad to say) agreed.

"We're all," I said, "Just rotten to the core.
It's a thing Maud, that you really can't ignore."
"But," I said, (and I nearly cried, because I felt so odd inside)
"We won't be rotten darling anymore."
I said, "It's not too late for us to change, Maud.
You only have to see the lives we lead.
Come on now. From now on, it's clean living!
And clean thinking!"
Then Maud said,
"Get you! You're stinking!"
....and I agreed.